Wednesday, 22 January 2014

The Only Way Is Up

I recently posted about Leo’s 2 and a half year check. The experience really wasn't what I had thought would happen at all. Although the health visitor is someone I have met before and usually request for any appointments, I feel that on this occasion she left a lot to be desired.

I don’t feel we got a full explanation as to why she said some of the things that she said. She didn’t even explain the pink slip that she gave us at the end of the appointment.

The way she talked about Leo made me feel somewhat judged? If that makes any sense at all. When you pour your everything into your child only to be told that really he isn’t where he should be, that really does make you question whether or not that you have done everything that you possibly could. In some respects you feel like you have failed your little person and that your best efforts are not good enough.

When I left that office that is exactly how I felt. I felt like a complete and utter failure. I looked at Leo and just saw my happy little guy who I only ever want the best for. I went home and saw my Mum, and I cried.

But now looking back in hindsight I hate that I felt any of those feelings. Leo is just a normal 2 and a half year old boy. I have shown Leo un-conditional love just as I should have, I have been teaching him about the ways of the world and giving him the space to grow at his own pace.

So my toddler isn’t jumping through hoops just yet, he beats to his own drum and will ultimately get there in his own time. That is something that the health visitor should know already. The way she sauntered from one topic of conversation to the next about her concern for his speech and his apparent lack of a attention span, to his squint… She didn’t explain herself once. She insinuated that Leo doesn’t give anyone eye contact, apparently he just looks straight through them, I just wanted to shout ‘HE IS 2!’ from the rooftops. If Leo is bored no he won’t co-operate. If Leo is tired he will not co-operate. If Leo is hungry… Guess what, he won’t co-operate.

That’s the funny thing about toddlers, they do have a mind of their own. Leo does give you eye contact, he looks lovingly into my eyes and kisses me on the lips. He looks at me for approval and reassurance that everything is ok.

So his speech may be delayed, and I will make sure that we get him to where he should be. But when it comes to a health visitor giving my toddler a look up and down with her professional hat on, I know that I can see development each and every day. Things she won’t see and probably won’t see in her office environment.

As Leo’s Mummy I know him inside and out, and although I left that office feeling like a failure, I only have to look at him to know that he is coming along in leaps and bounds everyday.

I don’t need a health visitor to tell me that, because I can see it for myself.

1 comment:

  1. Leo is a beautiful little boy, a normal two year old and as you said, he will do things in his own way. He is far better at running and climbing than Dylan, but maybe not as vocal, but these toddlers haven't read the manual, and they will develop one area first and then the next, they are all unique and individual. Hope you are proud of your lovely leo x