Monday, 13 February 2012

Limbo...


What do you call that time between having a baby and working.....Oh yes...that's it Maternity Leave. Or...Is it really Limbo?
I ask this question as on Friday night I attended my works annual party. It is always a brilliant night with good food, company and of course amazing wine! So why do I refer to my leave as limbo? To answer honestly....because it is.


While I am off enjoying my time, bonding with Leo. Life in the office continues and business blooms whether I am there or not. I trained someone else to complete my duties and everything runs just right. Without me.

I think this is a fear every woman on maternity leave has to face. I know my job is still there, but I kept asking myself whether or not I was a spare part now? I mean after all...I have been away from work for several months now and I will not be back for another four. Has the company moved on? Am I really needed now?


All my questions were answered on Friday night and the break out of day to day Mummy life, was a very welcome. It was lovely to be able to do my hair, make up and choose a pretty dress for the occasion. It was amazing to put on my heels for what felt like the first time in a eternity, enjoy a sit down meal, and see the people I used to see everyday.


Unfortunately every event has their hiccups...Last month I received a message from the girl I had trained up for my position at work, she wanted to know if I intended to wear my Blue ruched dress to said party. As now...She had the same dress in a deeper Blue and was wearing it on the night!

Understandably I was annoyed. Actually...I was fuming. Last year I had a 20 week bump. This year I wanted to make up for that! I felt my night had been stolen away from me...I am probably over reacting...But why did she have to wear my dress!? Why not one of the other hundred dresses she owns? I have to ask how would you react in my situation?

I searched high and low for a new 'Perfect' dress. Nothing came close to the dress I had already, and being on leave, I just couldn't justify spending a fortune on a new dress when I didn't need to!

To cut the dress wars short, upon my arrival...She was wearing my dress! No re-consideration had been taken and she looked more than happy to stamp all over my toes in the process of getting her own way. There was not much time wasted before she ran up to me to tell me that 'Oh My God! Were wearing the same dress!' What really!? God I had not noticed! Seriously...Purchasing an outfit IDENTICAL to someone you know, really is below the belt buckle.

I couldn't bring myself to stand around shooting false smiles and talking small talk all night so I quickly moved on with my evening. I did not want to stand around next to the girl....wearing MY dress!


The Champagne was flowing... and this year, I could accept all the re-fills and my oh my did I enjoy them. We all sat down for our evening meal where the Managing Director gave a speech about all that had been achieved within the last year.

After a scrumptious meal, everyone began to get up and mingle. There was a live band and open bar. All the makings of an amazing night.
So many people asked when I would be returning to work, to which I gave them all the same answer 'The end of June'. I was told I was missed and to hurry up back. That the standard of work was not as high. I felt great to know that I WAS still needed. I started to think of my return to the office and realised that there was one half of me...That was very excited to be returning to work. Of course I knew my Job was still there, but it was knowing my work was still coveted that really put the smile on my face.

I work for such a brilliant company. They were amazing throughout my pregnancy and just keep aiming higher. I could not ask for any more support or thought. They have gone above and beyond any expectations I may have had. It is safe to say that I have a job for life there, with so many opportunities ahead of me.

So apart from the dress wars, my night at the annual work's party was everything and more. My reservations have been relaxed and I was even told my dress was a prettier Blue :-)


How have you dealt with your maternity anxieties about returning to work? Have you ever had 'Dress Wars' of your own?


I think returning to work after the life changing event of having a baby, can be scary in it's self. Not just because you have to leave the child for what may be the first time ever, but you have to go back to work and find your place again. You have to re-train where changes have been made in the systems and procedures and be just as fast and competent as before going to to limbo....I mean Maternity Leave.

I plan to return fighting, I can do this and I have no problem rising to the occasion.


To Be Continued......(June 2012)

Laura xx